I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
