Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Randomize
