just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Randomize
