Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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