nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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