Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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