Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
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