Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
third nipple confirmed
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
