I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
