i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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