Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
