I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize