Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize