I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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