Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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