He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize