I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
