Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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