Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
If I die, sorry about rent.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
