at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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