break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
