Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
