remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
