Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
