he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
