i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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