so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
im holly from the hills drunk
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
