Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
