I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
