I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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