Kiss
Puke
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
