New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Randomize
