You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
