it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
