if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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