I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
