He kissed a someone with a penis
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
