I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
