Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
