The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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