i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
We need to rekindle our bromance
this boner is exhausting
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
