I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
