do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
