what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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