Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
