too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
