Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
My pussy is not your playground.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
