normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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