What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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