Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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