I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
